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Chexy Has Moved!

2010-06-19T15:44:00.000-07:00

Visit Chexydecimal at the new site and please bookmark it!

And it's still free to you!

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Thank you!

Your Chexy

Chexy's Saturday Matinee

2010-06-19T00:12:00.000-07:00

Here's Czech singer Ondřej Havelka and his Melody Makers with "Beat Me, Daddy, Eight to the Bar."

Here's Fred Astaire (with Fred Clark) in "Daddy Long Legs." Nice furniture!

James Brown... Papa's Got a Brand New Bag! From Shindig!

Beat Me Daddy, another way. Here's Maurice Rocco. The dancer is Mandy Lee.

Lakers Are a Girl's Best Friend

2010-06-18T16:25:00.000-07:00

Dyan Cannon, as she appeared after the Lakers win on Thursday, and Carol Channing.

So alike, only one married a gay icon and one is one.

ty SL

Are You Undateable?

2010-06-18T13:31:00.000-07:00

"311 Things Guys Do That Guarantee They Won't Be Dating or Having Sex" is now in print.

Here are a few of them.

Flesh-Tone Lipstick Fail, Part 3484

2010-06-18T13:15:00.001-07:00

Babs, can ya hear me? That lipstick isn't working! I mean, I can forgive the spackled base, but please!

That's how Streisand looked on the red carpet last night for stepson Josh Brolin's "Jonah Hex" movie premiere.

And it's time to cut that hair. Thanks, and have a great weekend! Tune in tomorrow for Chexy's Saturday Matinee!

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Ten Words You Need to Stop Misspelling

2010-06-18T08:40:00.000-07:00

from The Oatmeal

Happy Birthday, Roger Ebert

2010-06-18T07:07:00.000-07:00

Two thumbs up for cancer survivor Roger Ebert, who turns 68 today. He also survived shtupping Oprah.

The Megan in Red

2010-06-18T06:06:00.000-07:00

Megan Fox was snapped from one of her better angles... at last night's premiere of Warner Bros.' "Jonah Hex" at the ArcLight Cinerama Dome in Hollywood.

Jason Merritt/Getty Images

Original Queen of All Media Honored

2010-06-18T06:01:00.000-07:00

The endlessly fabulous Ruta Lee (left) embraces grandmother of gossip Rona Barrett (allegedly 73) at the Paley Center for Media in Beverly Hills, which staged a tribute to Barrett, who now mostly attends to her business of growing lavender on her ranch near Santa Barbara for products that benefit charity.

Her 1974 autobiography, "Miss Rona," began with this sentence:

"Just an inch, Miss Rona, just let me put it in an inch!"

Michael Tullberg/Getty Images

Carla in London

2010-06-18T05:26:00.000-07:00

First Lady of France, Carla Bruni-Sarkozy manages to find the camera as she and her Napoleon-sized husband Nicolas and Prince Chuck find their way to a statue of Charles de Gaulle in London, where they laid a wreath to commemorate de Gaulle's broadcast to Nazi occupied France on June 17, 1940, in which he declared himself the leader of the "Free French," which went on play a key role in defeating the Germans.

The full text of de Gaulle's speech is inscribed in a plaque on the Arc de Triomphe in Paris:

"The leaders who, for many years, have been at the head of the French armies have formed a government. This government, alleging the defeat of our armies, has made contact with the enemy in order to stop the fighting. It is true, we were, we are, overwhelmed by the mechanical, ground and air forces of the enemy. Infinitely more than their number, it is the tanks, the airplanes, the tactics of the Germans which are causing us to retreat. It was the tanks, the airplanes, the tactics of the Germans that surprised our leaders to the point of bringing them to where they are today.

But has the last word been said? Must hope disappear? Is defeat final? No!

Believe me, I who am speaking to you with full knowledge of the facts, and who tell you that nothing is lost for France. The same means that overcame us can bring us victory one day. For France is not alone! She is not alone! She is not alone! She has a vast Empire behind her. She can align with the British Empire that holds the sea and continues the fight. She can, like England, use without limit the immense industry of the United States.

This war is not limited to the unfortunate territory of our country. This war is not over as a result of the Battle of France. This war is a worldwide war. All the mistakes, all the delays, all the suffering, do not alter the fact that there are, in the world, all the means necessary to crush our enemies one day. Vanquished today by mechanical force, in the future we will be able to overcome by a superior mechanical force. The fate of the world depends on it.

I, General de Gaulle, currently in London, invite the officers and the French soldiers who are located in British territory or who might end up here, with their weapons or without their weapons, I invite the engineers and the specialized workers of the armament industries who are located in British territory or who might end up here, to put themselves in contact with me.

Whatever happens, the flame of the French resistance must not be extinguished and will not be extinguished. Tomorrow, as today, I will speak on the radio from London."

France was occupied by the Germans for over four years. Paris was liberated August 25, 1944.

Ian Gavan/Getty Images

Lakers Win!

2010-06-17T21:06:00.000-07:00

L.A. Lakers Win the World Championship!

Royal Ascot, Day 3 -- Ladies Day

2010-06-17T10:54:00.001-07:00

Princess Anne, the Princess Royal, wore this endlessly hideous dress (I use the term loosely) to Royal Ascot Ladies Day today, looking like the mother of a Mississippi Bat Mitzvah girl, or one of Lady Gaga's handmaidens, or a mascot for Yoo Hoo... (stop me).

Other attendees included Joan Collins in some leftover "Dynasty" shoulderpads...

and Betty Deuce... in her salute to Gay Pride Month! (They don't call her Queen for nothing.)

Stuart Wilson/Getty Images

My Kingdom for a Horse

2010-06-17T08:22:00.001-07:00

Princes William and Harry arrive on horseback to visit a child education center in Lesotho.

A hot photo ruined by douchey woolen caps, a trend that should have died about the time Kurt Cobain did. But the flooring is great.

Chris Jackson/Getty Images

Amy and the Lesbian Drama

2010-06-17T00:56:00.000-07:00

My imaginary daughter Amy, 6, really got into it this past weekend at Gay Pride.

Amy went again this year with Jean and Lynnae, who typically celebrate their sisterhood by having an argument, breaking up, and getting back together again two days later with an emotional display usually seen in such refined dramas as "Melrose Place."

"Lynnae called Jean bipolar. Is that where Santa lives?" asked my inquisitive little meat-eater as she microwaved a Lean Pocket.

"Yes," I lied. "What were they arguing about?"

"Lynnae wanted Jean to come to her birthday party, but Jean said Lynnae didn't respect her schedule, and Lynnae told her what mom used to say to you about 'go fuck yourself', and then Jean got all up in her stuff because Lynnae went shopping."

"Well, that's clear," I said, rolling my eyes far enough to nearly cause a retinal detachment. "Where did you go?"

"First we went to Hugo's, but we had to go home again because Lynnae was mad that Jean didn't take her lithimum, and Jean was mad because Lynnae asked this lady for a cigarette."

"Lith-E-um, darling," I corrected.

"That's what I said," she corrected. "Then Jean got a migrained."

I didn't correct her.

"So we had to go back to get Jean's medicine because Lynnae said she'd be a crazy beeyotch if she didn't take it. And then they were really quiet and Lynnae kept texting somebody, which made Jean even madder and she said we should go to breakfast without her and Lynnae was like, 'okay, whatevs', and Lynnae and I went to Coffee Bean. When we got back to Jean's, she was throwin' Lynnae's stuff off the balcony, and it was rainin' Xena comic books and a margarita machine and all these Jodie Foster DVDs."

She took a too-hot bite of her Lean Pocket and continued.

"And Jean was yellin' about Lynnae goin' to The Palms with her muffin and gettin' a tattoo or somethin' like that, I don't know what the hell they were talkin' about, and then this giant cardboard statue of Hillary Clinton was flyin' off the balcony, and then the cops came... two lady cops... and Jean got arrested for actin' crazy I guess. That's when mom came and got me and we helped Lynnae put her stuff in her truck."

"And what did you and mom do after that?"

"We went home and watched 'Real Housewives of New Jersey' on DVR."

Yes, I know, she's big for six.

Jew York

2010-06-17T00:12:00.000-07:00

Stacy, aka Goldy Lox.

ty Ennie

Who Wants Chicken?

2010-06-16T11:08:00.001-07:00

"Flipping Out" stars Jenni Pulos, the El Pollo Loco chicken, and bitch scream queen real estate flipper (yah, he flips, sure he does) Jeff Lewis at some fucksense called the Annual Grill Master Challenge in L.A. on Wednesday.

I'd prefer to see the grill master, who they dumped for that raggedy-ass weepy chicken.

David Livingston/Getty Images

Betty and Phil at Ascot, Day 2

2010-06-16T10:15:00.000-07:00

Betty Deuce wowed the horsey set in this loud pink ensemble, for which she had one of her WWII issue lead-lined brassieres brought down from the Royal Collection in the Tower of London. Other mad hatters at the races included these gems:

Oh, to be in England.

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Celebrating Gay Pride Month

2010-06-16T08:34:00.000-07:00

For all you Lebanese girls out there in Chexyland. Except you, bitch.

coilhouse.net

In a Perfect World...

2010-06-16T08:25:00.000-07:00

No, that's not the outside of your Chexy's house... that's a sidewalk somewhere in Cannes. Love it!

ty Bob

J.Lo Still Has It

2010-06-16T07:56:00.001-07:00

Jennifer Lopez shows that she's still got it -- at the Four Seasons of Hope Gala at Cipriani in New York City, but to be fair, this shows her at her best angle.

Kevin Mazur/WireImage for Samsung

Betty Deuce at Ascot

2010-06-16T07:44:00.001-07:00

Betty and Phil rode in style at the first day of the Royal Ascot races, where her majesty wore a subdued turquoise bonnet. I wish she would have worn this lady's hat! Fabulous!

And here's English footballer Michael Owen, high-hatting it.

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Twitter Fail Whale in Gulf

2010-06-15T14:01:00.000-07:00

from ecoterrorist.tumblr.com

Gabby's Mama Could Get Big Break

2010-06-15T09:32:00.001-07:00

The exquisite Gabourey Sidibe has just informed her Facebook followers that her mother, Alicia Tan Ridley, will be appearing on tonight's episode of "America's Got Talent."

Here's a clip from Bossip that shows mama singing in the subway.

ty J.Lo

The Britneyfication of J.Lo

2010-06-15T06:15:00.001-07:00

Yup, that's former Fly Girl Jenny from the Block as she appeared last night at the Apollo Theatre event, looking moderately altered, again, wearing a weave that looks like it's been around the block a few times... near Sunset Blvd.

A good deal of Mrs. Anthony will be 41 in July.

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And Now This Dance Interlude

2010-06-15T06:12:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of ExtraTV.com, here are some contestants from Oxygen's "Dance Your Ass Off."

Wash and Set Miss Jones

2010-06-15T05:55:00.001-07:00

In what I believe is only her second public appearance since undergoing cardiac surgery in late March, Starlet Marie Jones, 48, appeared on the red carpet at the Apollo Theater Spring Benefit Concert on Monday... looking as fit as a griddle. Wearing a sporty new two-toned hairdo, Miss Jones ambulated without assistance in a pleated pink mini.

Jemal Countess/Getty Images

Hiss of Windsor

2010-06-15T05:23:00.000-07:00

Prince Harry and Prince William kibbitz with an African rock python during a visit to Botswana today. I suppose that's what one does when they go to Botswana.

The Princes will also visit Lesotho and South Africa in support of their favorite charities... and then they'll stop in Cape Town to see England vs. Algeria in the World Cup.

The rock python rarely attacks humans, but the species can easily kill an adult by constriction.

Chris Jackson/Getty Images

Turban Tuesday: Royals in Nutty Hats, Part 863

2010-06-15T00:12:00.000-07:00

The goyals, er, I mean royals, were at it again on Monday with their wacky millinery, as seen most plainly above with plain Princess Anne, the poor dear, whose only benefit of this chapeau is that it hides her unfortunate tresses.

The pomp and pageantry was part of the Order of the Garter.*

Even future Good King Willie looked like some Mardi Gras frat boy. However...

nothing can detract from the regal majesty of Betty Deuce!

*"The Most Noble Order of the Garter is an order of chivalry, or knighthood, originating in medieval England. The Order is dedicated to the image and arms of St. George as England's Patron Saint, and is presently bestowed on recipients from British and other realms; it is the pinnacle of the honours system in the United Kingdom. Membership in the order is limited to the sovereign, the Prince of Wales, and no more than twenty-four members, or Companions; the order also comprises Supernumerary knights and ladies (e.g., members of the British Royal Family and foreign monarchs). Bestowing the honour has been described as one of the Monarch's few remaining truly personal, executive prerogatives." --Wikipedia

Anwar Hussein/WireImage

Weekday Vegetarianism

2010-06-14T12:21:00.000-07:00

Treehugger.com blogger Graham Hill has a suggestion for helping to save the planet... and perhaps ourselves.

TY Miss Pasadena, Yvo

See Monkey 'Do

2010-06-14T09:47:00.000-07:00

Designer Valentino as he appeared on arrival to the Taormina Film Festival, and a 3.5" figurine of a Wizard of Oz Flying Monkey.

So alike, and yet only one is wearing a suit designed by Adrian.

Tullio M. Puglia/WireImage

Copper Colossus

2010-06-14T08:57:00.000-07:00

The Queen of Soul wore this copper sheath to the Tony Awards... and that's not her bosom, that's the earthly manifestation of infinity.

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Burlesque on Carmen

2010-06-14T08:19:00.001-07:00

Carmen Electra and a pair of interesting spheres... at the A Time For Heroes Celebrity Picnic sponsored by Disney to benefit the Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric Aids Foundation.

John Shearer/Getty Images

Who's That Girl?

2010-06-14T00:12:00.000-07:00

When you see that well-shod foot step out of a Jag, along with that purse and a pair of black gloves in June, it can only be one girl...

Betty Deuce! -- who busted out wearing blue and her favorite brooch this Sunday for some Queen's Cup Polo.

That diamond, ruby and sapphire brooch is known as the Cartier Flower Basket, given to Betty by her mother after she popped out Prince Charles.

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Boston Massacre

2010-06-13T20:41:00.000-07:00

Kobe splats... and is comforted by a young Celtics fan. Lakers down 3-2.

See you next Tuesday.

Getty/Ronald Martinez

Royals in Nutty Hats, Part 32

2010-06-13T16:54:00.001-07:00

The royals had a big ol' time this weekend at the annual Trooping the Colour ceremony, which I think is just another excuse for all the royals to wear nutty headwear. Cases in point: Princesses Eugenie and Beatrice.

Leading the way in high-hattery was Prince Philip in his Beefeater bonnet, escorting Her Majesty, Betty Deuce, who opted for one of her ribbon-modified Guggenheim Museum ringers.

Camilla chose this anesthetizing bowler, so hideous that even bonnie Prince Willie had to hold up a hand to avoid even an accidental glimpse.

Getty/WireImage

Chexy's Saturday Matinee

2010-06-12T00:12:00.000-07:00

Elvis, in June of 1977, two months before his death at 42.

Judy, early '60s. Live orchestra, no autotune.

Frank, c. 1970.

Jolson, the original tweeter, 1935.

More Proof That Flesh-Tone Lipstick is a FAIL

2010-06-11T14:31:00.000-07:00

The erroneously glamorous Joan Van Ark, 96, as she appeared last night at the Mike Nichols AFI dinner.

Although matching your eyeliner with your roots is genius... if you live in Knots Landing or Dallas.

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Cher: The Fabulousness

2010-06-11T13:41:00.001-07:00

Cher, mostly 64 and the pride of El Centro, checks to see if her face is still attached while speaking Thursday at the AFI Life Achievement Award dinner honoring Mike Nichols.

Special flame retardants prevented her spontaneous combustion.

Thirty-two audience members were not as fortunate.

Kevin Winter/Getty Images

Another Reason Not to Wear Flesh-Tone Lipstick

2010-06-11T09:18:00.000-07:00

Pamela Anderson, who turns 43 on July 1st, at some opening last night.

You know that stretch of the 101 between Sunset and Alvarado?

David Livingston/Getty Images

Betty Deuce: Buttoned Up

2010-06-11T08:09:00.000-07:00

This is what you see if you've been a naughty princess, and you know you have been.

Betty Deuce focuses on Cabinet Secretary Gus O'Donnell during a visit to the Cabinet Office, where Her Majesty met with some civil servants, which may explain her cranky look.

Leon Neal/WPA-Pool/Getty Images

Chexy's Sports Roundup

2010-06-11T00:12:00.000-07:00

Phillies pitcher Cole Hamels demonstrates his fine form in a game last month against some team somewhere.

And the Celtics beat the Lakers last night, and there was drooling. Series tied at 2. Game 5 Sunday at 5 PDT. Dinner at my place.

This has been Chexy's Sports Roundup, especially for Philadelphians. I won't mention that Cup thing.

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Rachael Ray Makes Me Sick

2010-06-10T15:10:00.001-07:00

I was tuning in to watch Judge Judy, the Solomon of our time, when I was forced to lend one ear to the unfailingly annoying Rachael Ray, who was concocting something called Ranch Chicken Chili, an amalgamation of Ranch dressing and chicken chili. People applauded poblano chilis and other ingredients, leaving a giant WTF thought balloon over my head.

I once saw this dish on a sidewalk outside of Boardner's in Hollywood.

Swells

2010-06-10T13:31:00.000-07:00

Adorable couple Del Shores ("Sordid Lives") and actor Jason Dottley as they appeared at a pride event at Eleven in WeHo last night, where long pants were worn by nearly all.

David Livingston/Getty Images

All Eyes on the Center Ring

2010-06-10T07:34:00.000-07:00

Looking like the ringmaster at the Negative Al Jolson S&M Memorial Circus of the Stars wrap party, alleged designer Bobby Trendy appeared at some fucksense called "An Evening of Pride with Sharon Osbourne" last night in West Hollywood.

The pink bracelet is overkill.

David Livingston/Getty Images

Jane Meets Tarzan Yell

2010-06-10T06:57:00.000-07:00

Jane Fonda, 72, as she appeared in Paris today to collect a Vermeil Medal for being Jane Fonda, and 77-year-old comedy great Carol Burnett.

So alike, and yet only one can easily put her foot in her mouth.

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Camilla -- Back on Her Feet

2010-06-10T06:29:00.001-07:00

Like a vision of loveliness in a world full of horror (and vice versa), the long absent Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, has recovered from her leg fracture and is walking erect once again, just as every blue-blooded man does when she appears. And yes, that's my car parked in the background.

HRH presented the Orange Prize for Fiction at Royal Festival Hall yesterday, looking like a handmaiden from heaven with a short, summery version of her usual blockade hairdo.

Shall I compare thee to a Summer's Eve?

Samir Hussein/Getty Images

Remembering Charles Dickens

2010-06-09T09:50:00.000-07:00

Charles Dickens, seen here at age 38, died at age 58 on this day in 1870, five years to the day after surviving the Staplehurst train crash.

He is buried in the Poets' Corner of Westminster Abbey.

for Sean and Wendy

That's Where You'll Find Me

2010-06-09T07:55:00.000-07:00

Ninety-year-old "Wizard of Oz" Munchkin Jerry Maren, a wax figure of Judy Garland (who would have turned 88 tomorrow if she hadn't died of a barbiturate overdose in a London bathroom in 1969), lemon-drop delicious child star Margaret O'Brien, 73 (who worked with Judy on "Meet Me in St. Louis" in 1944), and Judy's rarely seen son, Joey Luft, 55.

Gay Pride Month Tidbit: It was the funeral of Judy Garland that mobilized gay unity, leading to the Stonewall Riots against persecution in NYC.

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Abnough Already

2010-06-09T07:26:00.000-07:00

Preeminent putz and "Jersey Shore" lunchmeathead Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino on the red carpet last night.

Okay, we get it. You go to the gym and you tan, and you pull up your shirt at every opportunity.

Does this work outside of New Jersey? And if it does, must it?

And Then There Were Three

2010-06-09T07:12:00.001-07:00

Previously-gendered actress Candis Cayne...

other-gendered champ of "Ru Paul's Drag Race," Tyra Sanchez...

and Perez Hilton.

Question is... does it matter?

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The Burden of Beauty

2010-06-09T06:58:00.000-07:00

Defender of Texas (and apparent Chexy fan) Mystique Summers Madison of "Ru Paul's Drag Race" arrives to Logo's 3rd annual "NewNowNext Awards" in Los Angeles. Also there: model and Madonna shtupper Jesus Luz.

Both squeezable.

Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

Chexy's Sports Roundup

2010-06-09T06:29:00.000-07:00

That's Foued Kadir of Algeria in his official FIFA World Cup portrait, looking like he's just seen something interesting on the web.

This has been Chexy's Sports Roundup, Lakers Beat the Celtics Last Night edition.

Alex Livesey - FIFA/FIFA via Getty Images

Lindsay Lohan Not Going to Can

2010-06-08T17:00:00.000-07:00

People just love to see lesbians in prison. I mean, look at all the hoopla there was when Martha Stewart was sent to the pokey for insider trading.

Now poor little drunk girl Lindsay Lohan has caused her SCRAM anklet to yell "I'm quitting this bitch" a reported five times. What's a gurl to do?

If you're LiLo, you call up a bail bondsman and post $200K to get the man off your back, so to speak, says TMZ.

Then you resume tweeting and shopping as though nothing had ever happened.

La la la la la la la la la la la la ... la la!

Betty Deuce in "Hello, Rwanda"

2010-06-08T16:20:00.001-07:00

And people say my place is a little busy!

That's Betty Deuce, receiving credentials from the Rwandan High Commissioner (and he'd have to be high to be wearing that!) Ernest Rwamucyo, in her parlor at Buckingham Palace today.

I do hope she accepts them, because they look so fabulous together; like Laura Ashley meets Robert Rauschenberg at Hearst Castle. They look as though they're about to break into song and dance! He's even got a cane!

(click pic for a better look)

Katie Collins - WPA Pool/Getty Images

Turban Tuesday

2010-06-08T08:42:00.000-07:00

Ethel Merman and her friend Benay Venuta were going out after a peformance of "Gypsy" one evening. Benay went to Ethel's dressing room where she saw Ethel struggling with a turban on her head, pulling locks of hair out from underneath it.

Benay went over to Ethel and said, "Oh, Ethel. That's not how you wear a turban. Let me show you," and tried pushing the strands of Ethel's hair back up under the turban.

Ethel pushed her hands away and said, "Fuck you, Benay! I need a little softness around my face."

ty former Chexydecimal London Bureau Chief Andy

Warm, Touchin' Warm

2010-06-08T06:56:00.000-07:00

Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg, 52, at last night's CFDA Fashion Awards gala, and her mother, Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, in 1991 at 62.

And her aunt, the late Eunice Kennedy Shriver, in her 80s.

Mrs. Schlossberg, below center, with her children (l to r) Rose, Tatiana and Jack Schlossberg, in August 2008 at the Democratic National Convention.

Forty-two years ago today, Caroline's uncle, Robert F. Kennedy, was buried at Arlington.

Getty/Dimitrios Kambouris
LIFE/David McGough
Paul J. Richards/Agence France-Presse/Getty Images

Paper Tigress

2010-06-08T06:28:00.001-07:00

Paper magazine co-founder and society hipster fixture Kim Hastreiter, 58, as seen at last night's CFDA Fashion Awards at Lincoln Center in NYC, where she was an honoree.

According to the NY Times, Kim is scheduled to get her hip fixed.

Just in time.

Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images

When You Find a Look That Works, Keep It

2010-06-08T05:05:00.000-07:00

Singer Nana Mouskouri has sold over 300 million records worldwide since the mid-1960s. She toured with Harry Belafonte and sang with Elvis. Now 75 and retired (really retired, not "Cher" retired), she appeared in Germany last night at a benefit for Africa.

Still fabulous.

Here she is on a French TV show in the '60s with some weird puppet.

Florian Seefried/Getty Images

Forgotten But Not Gone

2010-06-07T12:53:00.000-07:00

That blonde Idol guy.

Him.

At the MTV Movie Awards.

The Future is Now

2010-06-07T12:21:00.000-07:00

Snooki, on minute 32 of her 15 minutes of fame, as seen at the MTV Movie Awards, and Buddy Hackett.

One is more interesting dead than the other one is alive.

Johnny on the Spot

2010-06-07T09:20:00.000-07:00

Inscrutable fop ice skater Johnny Weir, and Judith Anderson as Mrs. Danvers in Hitchcock's "Rebecca."

So alike, and yet only one showed her ass in her reality show this past season.

It's Just Swelling

2010-06-07T08:54:00.000-07:00

Recovering wisdom tooth patient Lindsay Lohan, 47, as she appeared at the Dana Plato Movie Awards.

Neutral lipstick is unflattering.

Clip and save for reference.

Betty Deuce: Bug Off

2010-06-07T07:52:00.000-07:00

Her Majesty, Betty Deuce, receives the attention of a fly during a day of racing Saturday at Epsom.

An old queen knows what to do with a young fly.

Indigo/Getty Images

Chexy's Saturday Matinee

2010-06-05T00:12:00.000-07:00

The very young Sassy One... Miss Sarah Vaughan with Perdido.

From a far more innocent time... Woody Allen on "Candid Camera."

Ah, summer. Time for a beer. Thanks, woolydoozer.

June is bustin' out all over. From Rodgers and Hammerstein's "Carousel," 1958.

YouTube Video Resizer

Ricky

2010-06-04T06:01:00.001-07:00

Ricky Martin, father of two, as seen last night at the 2010 amfAR New York Inspiration Gala at the New York Public Library, where the "Livin' La Vida Loca" singer was honored for his foundation's philanthropic contributions to the health and welfare of children around the globe.

This was one of Ricky's first appearances since he announced that he's gay.

The evening's festivities were marred by the appearance of designer Thom Browne in this highly unfortunate outfit, which I will call a shmucksedo.

Andrew H. Walker/Getty Images

Betty Deuce: Am I Blue?

2010-06-04T05:26:00.000-07:00

Her Majesty, Betty Deuce, met seaside with naval families in Plymouth yesterday. And yes, her hat can be used as a flotation device.

Arthur Edwards/WPA Pool/Getty Images

Rue Pall

2010-06-03T16:56:00.000-07:00

"Well pardon me, Dorothy, but we can't all come from places as socially acceptable as Brooklyn."

--Rue McClanahan as Blanche Devereaux on "The Golden Girls"

Betty Deuce Made a Mess

2010-06-03T07:00:00.000-07:00

I don't know what's going on with Betty's dress. It looks like she got splashed by some spanakopita at the royal buffet for King Constantine of Greece's 70th birthday party in London. Grease from Greece!

Indigo/Getty Images

Ru Pall

2010-06-02T06:47:00.001-07:00

Former "High Rollers" hostess Ruta Lee, most of whom turned 74 this past weekend, as seen at the Society of Singers (SOS) annual gala at the Beverly Hilton last night.

Ruta began her Hollywood career as a cashier at Grauman's Chinese Theatre.

She and her restaurant exec husband live in the Hollywood Hills home once inhabited by Rita Hayworth and Orson Welles.

For fifty years, Ruta and Debbie Reynolds have staged the annual Thalians Ball, providing help for troubled youth and mental health organizations.

Ruta received a star on Hollywood's Walk of Fame in 2006.

If you live in the Fort Worth, Texas area, perhaps you caught her in 2008 as Clairee in a production of Steel Magnolias with Sally Struthers at the Casa Mañana Theatre.

David Livingston/Getty Images

How to Know When Your Hair, Eyebrow and Moustache Dye is Too Dark

2010-06-02T06:12:00.000-07:00

NRA member, McCain supporter and avocado farmer Tom Selleck, 65, as seen at the premiere of "Killers" last night in Hollywood.

Clip and save for reference.

Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

A Pair of Queens and a King

2010-06-02T05:55:00.001-07:00

The vision in buttery yellow is Queen Sonja of Norway, welcomed Queen Beatrix of the Netherlands (the one wearing part of a Volkswagen on her head). That's Sonja's hubby, King Harald V, as seen at the National Monument in Oslo on Tuesday.

Photo by Ragnar Singsaas/WireImage

Turban Tuesday

2010-06-01T17:37:00.000-07:00

In case you didn't notice... it's Turban Tuesday!

Singh out, Louise!

Photo by Cousin Joshie

Abu is Dead, Again

2010-06-01T06:58:00.001-07:00

He's been reported dead at least twice before, now Al Qaida CFO Mustafa Abu is reportedly most sincerely dead after a drone attack in Pakistan, not to be confused with Kwik-E-Mart proprietor Apu Nahasapeemapetilon.

American Idol

2010-06-01T06:17:00.000-07:00

"Hooray."

Memorial Day

2010-05-31T00:12:00.000-07:00

Remember the soldiers who fought the good fight on the side of good.

Chexy's Fashion Report: Blue Man

2010-05-30T12:48:00.001-07:00

A model wears a design by Blue Man at the Fashion Rio Summer 2011 in Rio de Janeiro on Sunday.

Now this is a look I can get behind.

And here's one for the ladies.

Luisa Gomes/LatinContent/Getty Images

Chexy's Sports Roundup

2010-05-30T07:29:00.000-07:00

Lakers win!

I have a hard time hitting the trashcan.

Chexy's Saturday Matinee

2010-05-29T00:12:00.000-07:00

It's Memorial Day weekend, so here's some folks entertaining the troops.

Judy Garland, introduced by Bob Hope.

And here's a few clips of Bob Hope and the soldiers over the years. In one of these clips, he's 87.

Today would have been JFK's 93rd birthday, so here's his brother-in-law, Peter Lawford, and Marilyn Monroe to sing him Happy Birthday. Everybody! (for GL)

And here are the trailers for "This is the Army," and "Hollywood Canteen." Surprise guest stars!

Dicky Me's

2010-05-28T14:14:00.000-07:00

McDonald's has a new ad running in France. I have a tough time believing this is for real, but it apparently is.

YouTube Video Resizer MySpace Layouts MySpace Codes MySpace Backgrounds

ty J.Lo

Sex and the WTF is on Her Head?

2010-05-28T13:32:00.001-07:00

Sarah Jessica Parker and her headdress at last night's London premiere of "Sex and the City 2," and the crab nebula.

So alike, and yet only one is stunningly beautiful.

Gary Coleman in Coma in Provo Hospital

2010-05-28T09:36:00.000-07:00

He survived two kidney transplants and being that close to Nancy Reagan's hair, but it's not looking good for Arnold, who like most of the residents of Utah, is unconscious.

UPDATE: Coleman went to that great sitcom in the sky today. Read his obit here.

Captain America

2010-05-28T04:41:00.000-07:00

Hooray! They stopped the Nazis!

From March, 1941, Captain America
viewlinerltd.blogspot.com

Memorial Day Weekend

2010-05-28T04:35:00.000-07:00

Remembering the soldiers of WWII -- and one of their favorite pin-ups, Esther Williams. (click pic to enlarge)

Oil, That Is

2010-05-27T12:42:00.001-07:00

Are you thinking of this too?

Betty Deuce -- A Feather in Her Cap

2010-05-27T10:47:00.001-07:00

Good Queen Betty Deuce doesn't look completely convinced that her hat is working, and indeed, it looks like something to be worn to Shrek's wedding, but Betty wore it to greet her peeps at the 150th Anniversary of the Eton Combined Cadet Force, whatever that is.

The brooch, BTW, is the Kent Amethyst Brooch #2, a giant hexagonal-cut amethyst surrounded by diamond sunrays.

David Parker/WPA Pool/Getty Images

Wild Horses

2010-05-27T09:06:00.001-07:00

Mick Jagger ex Jerry Hall (with their daughter, Georgia May Jagger) at the London launch of their new cosmetic line Invisible Zinc... and My Little Pony.

So alike, and yet only one got $25 million for 9 years with Mick.

Getty

Chexy's Sports Roundup: Mounds of Venus

2010-05-27T07:15:00.001-07:00

Venus Williams, as amply seen Wednesday during a match against some lady from Spain at the French Open.

This has been Chexy's Sports Roundup, Round and Up edition.

Clive Brunskill/Getty Images

Paris Entertains the Soldiers

2010-05-27T05:53:00.000-07:00

No, it's not a new porno from Paris Hilton, she's "entertaining" US servicemen at the USO Swinging Salute to our Troops Fleet Week kickoff at The Union Square Ballroom in Manhattan.

It's Memorial Day Weekend, so take a moment to remember the soldiers, and Paris Hilton.

Andrew H. Walker/Getty Images

And the Winner of American Idol Is...

2010-05-26T22:08:00.000-07:00

Lee DeWyze. Amazing.

Goodbye, Art Linkletter

2010-05-26T12:19:00.001-07:00

Republican stalwart, TV pioneer and noted bastard Art Linkletter (seen in upper bubble), who emceed the opening of Disneyland in 1955, has croaked at age 97.

Best known for his "House Party" show and "Kids Say the Darndest Things" show and books, Linkletter (seen above with the Nixons and Walt Disney) was one of the wealthiest men in show business.

He leaves his wife of 74 years, Lois, and two children.

Linkletter was predeceased by three children; Jack, who died at age 70 in 2007; Robert, who died in a 1980 car wreck; and Diane, who jumped out a window in 1969.

When Porn Stars Age

2010-05-26T06:35:00.000-07:00

Well, it's happened. Kim Kardashian has apparently used so much Botox and lip plumper that she's unable to move her face at all, as seen at some Armani event last night in Hollywood. Most of Kim will be 30 in October, and girl is clearly taking it hard, and we know from her film work that she does.

Expect her to appear on next season's "Dancing with the Stars." Oh, wait, nevermind.

Hillary Clinton Cloned in China

2010-05-25T10:39:00.000-07:00

Chinese geneticists confirmed that they've cloned two identical Hillary Clintons, and put them on display at the Shanghai World Expo on Monday.

An hour later, they were all hungry again.

(click button)

Doors Open for Gabourey

2010-05-25T09:14:00.001-07:00

The lovely Gabourey Sidibe at last night's "Sex and the City 2" premiere...

and a new Amana Side-by-Side refrigerator with:

*Ice and Water Dispenser with PUR Water and Ice Filter: Conveniently fill glasses and other tall containers with water and ice simultaneously without opening the refrigerator door.
* Adjustable Spillsaver™ Glass Shelves: Keep small spills from becoming big messes by containing them to one shelf only.
* Garden Fresh™ Crisper Drawers: Humidity-controlled crisper drawers keep fruit and vegetables fresh for longer.
* ENERGY STAR® Qualified: This refrigerator meets the 2008 ENERGY STAR® guidelines for energy efficiency.

Both chill.

Celestial Gaga

2010-05-25T09:06:00.000-07:00

Lady Gaga in her granny chic hair and clothing in Paris today... and 93-year-old "All About Eve" star Celeste Holm at an Oscar party in March.

So alike, and yet only one married an opera singer on her 87th birthday.

Betty Deuce -- The Royal Bling

2010-05-25T08:26:00.000-07:00

Betty Deuce whipped out her King George IV State Diadem crown... a mere 1,333 diamonds weighing 327.75 carats, festooned with 169 pearls along the base. Between the four crosses are the rose, thistle and shamrock; symbols of England, Scotland and Ireland. She wears it for the procession to Opening of Parliament.

She switched it up for the Imperial State Crown to give her speech.

Hey, why not have Betty tell you about it herself? Yes, it's the early 1970s all over again...

Liza with a Ziploc Bag

2010-05-25T07:54:00.000-07:00

The original celebuspawn, 64-year-old "Sterile Cuckoo" star Liza Minnelli, wore this elaborate Centrum Silver baggie to the "Sex and the City 2" premiere last night in New York, New York.

The geriatric gamine wore a matching choker... while everyone else just choked.

Getty

Turban Tuesday

2010-05-25T00:03:00.000-07:00

Indian Prime Minister Monmohan Singh and his turban, as seen in a speech yesterday, trying to improve relations with Pakistan.

The glorious Eartha Kitt in her feathered turban; Catwoman can wear anything.

And some dude.

Thank you for playing Turban Tuesday!

Lohan is Frank in Court

2010-05-24T11:44:00.000-07:00

Party girl Lindsay Lohan, 63, as seen at a court hearing this morning on her DUI mess, and Tim Curry as Frank N. Furter.

So alike, and yet only one is part of an ongoing horror show.

Pretty Babies

2010-05-24T08:11:00.000-07:00

Brooke Shields as she appeared at the Drama Desk Awards in New York City on Sunday, and her friend Michael Jackson.

So alike, and yet only one is a living white woman.

ty J.Lo

Amy and the High Court

2010-05-24T03:13:00.000-07:00

My imaginary daughter Amy, 6, spent Saturday at the home of her friend Shinnae, whose mother, Mahogany, is a plumber.

"Mahogany showed me how to use a pipe wrench," chirped my curiously accomplished angel as she reached for a third piece of toast (from my plate). "You're not eating that, right, Ricky?"

"So Mahogany and her friend Jane were discussing the Supremes Court nominee," she blurted in a display of whole grain crumbs. "Supreme," I corrected. "And?"

"Jane was mad that people on TV were talking about how Kagan wasn't a lebsbian, and why it even mattered if she was a bread baker, but I don't understand what one thing has to do with another. Don't they allow bakers on the Supremes... Supreme Court?"

My inquisitive girl left me momentarily stumped as to which direction to take this conversation.

"Whether or not she is a lesbian is irrelevant. Her sexuality does not make her a better or worse justice." I ignored the whole bread-baking remark, hoping that it could wait for another day.

"Mahogany said it would be interesting to watch them try to get into her panties during the Senate conversation hearings, but I don't understand why they're talking about her panties to begin with... do you think she has Dora panties like mine?"

"I don't know if she has Dora the Explorer underwear, sweetheart, but I'm sure that if she does, they'll probably find out about it."

"They're really the best underpants, I think," offered her budding legal mind, adding, "Maybe I should send her a pair? Can we, Rick?"

And so I bought some Dora panties on Amazon and sent them to Ms. Kagan, c/o the Supreme Court with this note from Amy: "Dear Elena, when they want to see your panties, you will be ready. Love, Amy."

Yes, I know she's big for six.